Real Men of Genius

[tutusue]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Pomai? Is today your day off?

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Pomai? Is today your day off?

Sort of. And now I'm off to an official 3-day Veterans' Day weekend, so don't mind if I come up with some ridiculous ideas for this thread. Read (and/or sing along/or be offended) at your own risk or entertainment.

My fav' so far is the Hawaiian Bracelet and Graduation Day Lei Wearer version.

That first link I made was bad. Here's a better link to the original sound clips from A. Busch. And I must agree with the author of that site - this AB ad campaign is pure brilliance.

[tutusue]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Rock on, Pomai!

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Cheap Luau Party Caterer
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Cheap Luau Party Caterer!
Tonight we salute you, Mr. cutter of Hawaiian Food corners
Is that Lomi Salmon, or Lomi Tomato?
And is that a laulau, or Popeye's leftover spinach dinner?
Back-up singer follows with>>> It's a mystery
You call that poi
but we say it's "cold taro soup"
Back-up singer follows with>>> Thank God there's rice
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. "Liquid Smoke Kalua Pig Man"
You may fool tourists
but you can't fool us
Mr. Cheap Luau Party Caterer

[kanahina]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Those were hilarious!

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. H1 Freeway Accident Rubberneck Driver
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. H1 Freeway Accident Rubberneck Driver!
Today we salute you, Mr. "That's not my problem, it's yours" rush hour accident passerby'er
It may be a minor fender bender
but you're hoping it's a spectacle of disastrous proportions
*Back-up singer follows with >>> Somebody call the tow truck
Was that 1, 2 or 3 cars involved?
Who cares, you just want to see other people's misery, at the expense of every driver behind you
*Back-up singer follows with >>> My brake light is workin'
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Witness-slash-detective of Traffic crash-bam mayhem
You might be late for work
but at least you got to see a broken turn-signal assembly strewn on the asphalt
Mr. H1 Freeway Accident Rubberneck Driver

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Edit...

Mr. Graduation Day Lei Wearer
lyrics by Pomai

Real Men of Genius
Mr. Graduation Day Lei Wearer!
Today We'd salute you, but we don't think you can see us
Your mom, dad, uncle, aunt, cousin and every friend you know
put a lei over that head of yours
*back-up singer follows with >>> I'd rather get the money
The leis are stacked so high on you,
it looks like one wrong step, and you'd fall over
*back-up singer follows with >>> someone get me a periscope
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light Mr. Tower of Flowers
Because there's 10 more leis comin' your way
and don't you get caught giving any of them away
Mr. Graduation Day Lei Wearer

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Coconut Tree Leaf Crafts Person
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Coconut Tree Leaf Crafts Person!
Today we salute you, oh Twister of the Palms
Is that a fish? A hat? a beach mat?
Or are you just happy to see me?
*Back-up singer follows with>>> Make me a Giraffe
Origami's got nothin' on your skills
Make me a working car, buddy, and I'll pay ya' $100 bucks for it
*Back-up singer follows with>>> That's! thinkin' green
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh weave leaf wonder
I just hired a Samoan guy to chop the coconuts off my tree
but next time, I'll tell him to chop down all the leaves, too
Mr. Coconut Tree Leaf Crafts Person

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. "Ikaika" Rear-View Mirror Accessoriser
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Ikaika Rear-View Mirror Accessoriser!
Today we salute you, Mr. Car Kahuna
If the cop cites you for obstruction of view
tell him, "back off buddy, or THIS Kahuna will get REAL angry"
*Back-up singer follows with>>> Oooh, I'm really scared
When your dashboard gets dirty
The feathers on this cool decoration
will do double-duty as a duster
*Back-up singer follows with>>> Don't miss the air vents
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh Masked Mirror Man
There's a sale at the swap meet for these cool little Hawaiian Helmets
So get one for your other car
and for sistah, braddah, uncle and aunty's car, too
Mr. Ikaika Rear-View Mirror Accessoriser

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Oahu Traffic Radio Reporter
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Oahu Traffic Radio Reporter!
This morning we salute you, oh "Reporter of Many, Master of None"
It doesn't take a genius to remind us that too many cars are on the road
but you just reminded us
Back-up singer follows with>>> get me an aspirin
Sure there's a back-up at the Middle street merge
Buddy, isn't that the same case, EVERY SINGLE DAY?
Back-up singer follows with>>> I need to to hear it again
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Obvious
An accident just happened 10 cars in front of me
and you'll report it on the radio 1 hour later
Mr. Oahu Traffic Radio Reporter

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Bishop Street Aloha Shirt Office Worker
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Bishop Street Aloha Shirt Office Worker!
Today we salute you, Mr. Pimp of Floral Patterns
Yesterday it was canoes
The day before it was Ukuleles
Today... it's Hibiscus
*Back-up singer follows with>>> That's the state flower
As long as the Aloha shirt YOU'RE wearing
ISN'T the same shirt I'M wearing, it's cool
*Back-up singer follows with>>> I bought it at ROSS
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Plumeria Bank Man
There's still 3 days left in the work week
and you only have 2 clean Aloha Shirts hanging in the closet
Mr. Bishop Street Aloha Shirt Office Worker

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. & Mrs. Tantalus Lookout Make-Out in the Car Couple
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men & Women of Genius
Mr. & Mrs. Tantalus Lookout Make-Out in the Car Couple!
Tonight, make that REAL late, we salute you oh smoochers of the city lights
Your windows are foggy and we know what you're doing
but you two really don't give a damn
*Back-up singer follow with>>> Put on a love song
Hey, buddy, you better check your shock absorbers
because tonight, they're not working
*Back-up singer follow with>>> I better call Midas
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Romeo and Juliet of the high hills
Another love song just started playing on the car radio
and this is going to be a long and hot, steamy night
Mr. & Mrs. Tantalus Lookout Make-Out in the Car Couple

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Box-of-Malasadas Office Gift Donator
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Box-of-Malasadas Office Gift Donator!
This morning we salute you, Mr. Good Will of the Deep-Fried
That's just what we need, sitting in this office chair with zero exercise
That's just what SHE resents about working in this office
*Back-up singer follows with>>> Somebody call Jenny Craig
Here I was enjoying this fruit
when you tempt me - and we all can't resist -
A Malasada
*Back-up singer follows with>>> Give me some refined sugar!
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh donor of a heart attack in a bun
My waist is bulging
thanks to you
Mr. Box-of-Malasadas Office Gift Donator

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

Mr. Stand-Behind-the-News-Reporter Shaka Person
lyrics by Pomai

Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
Mr. Stand-Behind-the-News-Reporter Shaka Person!
Today we salute you, Mr. Ambassador of Manual Aloha
We were watching BAD news
but your shaka made it GOOD news
*Back-up singer follows with >>> that's a cut
You're lucky we're live, buddy
because if we weren't, you'd be edited out
*Back-up singer follows with >>> what the hell?
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Ham of the Shaky Hand
We're taping another segment, and we'd rather you not be there
yet we know you'll be there anyway
Mr. Stand-Behind-the-News-Reporter Shaka Person

[Pomai]

Re: Real Men of Genius

I'm flat out of ideas (without going political). Any takers?

Real Men of Genius