[rant] Teens don't know the real world

[adrian]

After my brother found out that tmobile's down in our area, he's begging my Mom to change to Nexthell. I said that it'll be back tomorrow, but he said just change.

He has a v300, and asked me to change the faceplate and add ringtones, but he doesn't use it (probably only used it once, but that was when the family went out). Yes, he's the one who's Nokia 3390 got stolen at school, and he's acting like he can buy anything he wants (but he uses my CC to buy music from itunes). He doesn't know that we're paying $95 for 5 phones on a familytime plan, and just asks my Mom for money and buys expensive clothes and shoes.

That's my rant for tonight.

[Menehune Man]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

With the amount of debt the average American has, besides education loans, teenagers appear to be growing up into adults that don't know how to live in the real world either! As I was growing up I was lucky enough to have all I needed, but my parents didn't give me all that I wanted. Which was good for me. Until 5 years ago I never had a credit card. So if I wanted something bad enough I saved for it. Since getting the cards my wife and I have not been out of debt. I haven't had a card for quite awhile now. She's struggling to deal with what she caused and said she learned her lesson. It is affecting both of us since I'm helping her. Learn from other's mistakes, credit cards and unnecessary loans waste your money in interest. Just say no.

[craigwatanabe]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

There is a necessary evil in owning credit cards. I have a few of them for specific purposes. One for gas because the way gas prices are going having $60 in cash in my wallet is more dangerous than a credit card. You lose the credit card, you simply call it in. Lose $60 cash...well you're out $60.

Another credit card has a limit of only $500 and is used for online purchases and car rental (necessary when renting a car or booking a hotel when traveling).

And one major credit card with a large limit that is kept on the side for those unexpected major events like car repair, home appliance replacement whatever. When your budget didn't anticipate it and the unexpected happened.

I teach my kids to save the money they get as gifts or earn but spend a little so they won't feel as if their money isn't so out of touch with their lives. I had a friend who was so obsessed with saving money he never realized he was smooching off his friends when it came to going out. So the rule to my kids are: Save a lot spend a little.

But having credit is important these days as dealing with cash only can be a dangerous proposition if you lose your wallet or worse yet get hijacked. I try not to carry more than $40 cash in my wallet because when I lost it with more than $300 in it I realized there was no way to recover that money. Recently when my 18-month old kid picked up my wallet off my dresser and threw it away, I only had to call the bank and credit card companies and have them reissue new cards and cancel the old ones. No money lost and I was up and running in three days. As for cash I went to the bank and withdrew some cash to tide me over until the replacement cards came in.

Credit is important if you want to buy a home or car and when traveling. Without a credit history, some landlords won't rent you a place. If you go to college, you need up front money while the student loan or scholarship is processed. College books can run up to the several hundreds of dollars. When you buy your books you don't want to be walking to the UH book store with that kind of cash in your pocket.

At least with credit cards if a $2000 auto repair transaction is refuted by a shady business, a credit transaction has a paper trail showing proof of purchase. A cash deal won't.

[Miulang]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

As Craig says, in this country, having at least one credit card (if only for emergencies) is almost necessary. There is a downside to credit cards, though. If you have too many active credit cards, your FICO scores (used when determining whether you're credit worthy enough for a mortgage or car loan, among other things) could be jeopardized.

One thing about debit/cash v. credit cards: the rules regulating debit/cash cards is different from credit cards. When buying stuff online, use a credit card and not a debit card if you can. If something goes wrong with an online transaction and you use a credit card (or if someone steals your credit card info and tries to buy something), you can work with the credit card company (you're only liable for the first $50, and sometimes not even that) to mitigate the damage. With a debit card, if something goes wrong, you don't have the same kind of protection (although some national commercial banks like Bank of America claim you do get the same kind of protection). Using a debit card is like writing a check or cash; it comes out of your bank account immediately (because of a new banking rule called Check 21, the notion of a "float" is gone because funds are taken electronically from your account immediately), so it's definitely going to be tougher to get that money back than it is to contest a charge that you haven't yet paid. You might still get some "float" on a debit/cash card from a credit union account, though.

Miulang

[Menehune Man]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

For a teenager to learn personal financial discipline, it needs to be taught by the parents. All kids of any age will ask for what they want! The parents need to decide what is proper to give, have the child "work" for it or outright say no.

[craigwatanabe]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

You're absolutely right on that. For my children in order for them to understand sound financial judgement in their ability to handle things of value, I have to give them the tools to work with and educate them in how to use those tools to their benefit.

They have a concept of what it means to "save up" for that PS2 game they wanted, or choosing between an immediate purchase with money "in hand" versus saving it for a better, more prudent purchase later on.

When my 21-year old was a teenager I wondered why he never grasped the concept of saving up for the things you want instead of immediate gratification as he understood was the way of life.

I realized his perception of "I Want" developed by watching me and my wife. I discovered that I needed to change the way I handled money if I wanted to teach my kids the value of it.

Okay I slip now and then (like when I bought that $2000 Rainbow vacuum cleaner) but I think I got the message across my younger boys that it's okay to wait and not buy right now. I tell them whenever they want to buy or want something, "Is it something I need or is it something I want" If it's a need then you justify it. If it's a want well can you afford it without hurting your budget? By the time you analyze the potential purchase, hopefully the urge to buy it will fall to the reality check of want versus need.

When my older kids tell me they understand the world and I don't I ask them how much they know now as a teenager than as they did when they were younger? A lot more. So I tell them if you learned that much between age 10 and 13 can you imagine how much more you can learn about the real world between 13 and parenting age? A whole lot more.

Kinda puts things in perspective.

[adrian]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

Today is my sister's bday, and guess what she wanted? Either an iPod, new cell phone, or a laptop!!!

She doesn't even use her current cell phone (a Samsung r225, which was my younger brother's first cell phone [her first cell (a Motorola c650) was water damaged after she left it in her shorts when she went to the beach]), she had an MP3 player that I first used (then my younger brother used it, and it was working when she received it but she broke it a month after using it), and she uses my Mom's desktop computer, just going on myspace and buying songs w/ my Mom's CC.

As I see the difference between me when I was 11 and her, I wonder how the future will survive.

[Fondoo2]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

As I see the difference between me when I was 11 and her, I wonder how the future will survive.

r u sure she isn't getting it from you big brother? Doh!!

[adrian]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

r u sure she isn't getting it from you big brother? Doh!!

I actually think its my Mom.

When I was my sister's age, we used to clean the house at 5:00pm sharp, with anyone recieving lickings (or atleast the "count") if he didn't do it. Now that she has a care home and a better income than what she got as a preschool teacher, she's spoiling the young ones.

[Fondoo2]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

hey you have old man stories for your kid sister already!!
like "Heh Heh kids today,well back in my day we had to clean house at 5:00am or get the switch!!" Now figure in a long walk thru the snow into that and you got an instant classic!

[Leo Lakio]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

Just say no.

Best lesson you can teach a teen about the real world.

Like the song says, you can't always get what you want. Teach a child how to handle disappointment with strength, and you will give them one of the best survival skills they will ever need.

[adrian]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

hey you have old man stories for your kid sister already!!
like "Heh Heh kids today,well back in my day we had to clean house at 5:00am or get the switch!!" Now figure in a long walk thru the snow into that and you got an instant classic!

I think I'll need to make up a story about walking a couple of blocks to school, instead of taking a car (or even driving yourself)

And we cleaned the house at 5pm (1700hrs), not 5am - although most of us were up at that time to eat breakfast or get ready for work

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

I think I'll need to make up a story about walking a couple of blocks to school, instead of taking a car (or even driving yourself)

You're too young to have watched Monty Python, so in the interests of bettering your education I offer this sketch.

[kimo55]

Re: [rant] Teens don't know the real world

glad ya found that. been in my head for weeks.

thot maybe it may be a link to that minister of silly walks sketch, too