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  • Discipline

    pzarquon's thread got me thinking to ask this. my sons a real punk. half of the time, I have to admit he dosent listen. Well I would say 60 out of 100% of the time he dosent listen. Of course I cant expect a 3yr old to listen 100% of the time. But, to get him to be more respectful and listen a little bit more instead of ignoring me or just plain old not listening to me.. what type of discipline do you give your child? what do you do when your child dosent listen?

    like I said in that thread, z will get a spank on the hand, not hard but not too soft and also on the muli, again not more than once and not hard or too soft. I dont spank him often either.
    Thanks


  • #2
    Re: Discipline...

    Originally posted by Ecntrc View Post
    pzarquon's thread got me thinking to ask this. my sons a real punk. half of the time, I have to admit he dosent listen. Well I would say 60 out of 100% of the time he dosent listen. Of course I cant expect a 3yr old to listen 100% of the time. But, to get him to be more respectful and listen a little bit more instead of ignoring me or just plain old not listening to me.. what type of discipline do you give your child? what do you do when your child dosent listen?

    like I said in that thread, z will get a spank on the hand, not hard but not too soft and also on the muli, again not more than once and not hard or too soft. I dont spank him often either.
    Thanks
    Did you read that whole thread?

    pax

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    • #3
      Re: Discipline...

      Originally posted by Ecntrc View Post
      like I said in that thread, z will get a spank on the hand, not hard but not too soft and also on the muli, again not more than once and not hard or too soft. I dont spank him often either.
      Thanks
      You should have kept it on that thread.

      Same thing.

      Auntie Lynn
      Be AKAMAI ~ KOKUA Hawai`i!
      Philippians 4:13 --- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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      • #4
        Re: Discipline...

        Just dont hit the head. Everything else is fair game.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Discipline...

          If he continues to "not listen" to you when he starts kindergarten, you probably should have him evaluated for attention deficit because it will affect his ability to interact with other kids and his teachers.

          Miulang
          "Americans believe in three freedoms. Freedom of speech; freedom of religion; and the freedom to deny the other two to folks they don`t like.” --Mark Twain

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          • #6
            Re: Discipline...

            I think once he hits about 4 1/2 he will be ok.
            I havea 3 and 4 year old. The 3 year old doesn't listen very well, but it is the age too. They don't quite grasp communication as well at that age.
            Be patient, it will come. At that age you don't knwo if they are extra tired, or getting sick, or just having a bad day, or not understanding.
            I do put him in his room if he throws a fit.
            I did when my 4 year old was 3 too.

            Most of the issues with my 3 year old now revolve around attention.
            So when it gets real bad I take him in my arms and hold him and soothe him. My husband started this and it works. He holds him and talks very calmly to him and explains slowly what is going on. Most times it works.

            Anyways...that's just my 2 cents.
            Since when is psycho a bad thing??
            Sharing withother survivors...
            www.supportandsurvive.org

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            • #7
              Re: Discipline...

              Originally posted by Miulang View Post
              If he continues to "not listen" to you when he starts kindergarten, you probably should have him evaluated for attention deficit because it will affect his ability to interact with other kids and his teachers.

              Miulang
              Are you serious Miulang? I don't know many 3-5 year olds that listen nowadays. It depends on how you parent them. If you let them get away with stuff...then they will run all over you. I don't believe in that whole "add adhd" crap.
              Last edited by PoiBoy; February 6, 2007, 08:32 PM.

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              • #8
                Re: Discipline...

                I have a four year old and a two year old daughter. The little one is a sweetie, but the oldest? Ho, stubborn doesn't even begin to describe her. We say up, she goes down, we say right, she goes left. I like her independent nature (reminds me of me ), but chee.

                My wife will spank every once in a while if they really really deserve it and there's no other choice. Otherwise, we just try to speak to them firmly and rationally like we would to an adult (but talking more slowly and using simpler words). Kids seem to have some innate ability to tell when adults are being condescending to them, even if they don't yet know what that word means. I've never spanked them, and never will; just don't have the heart to. When I was a kid, my dad used to spank me hard. Actually, spank is the wrong word. Beat the living s**t out of me is more accurate. But that's story for a different thread! Anyways, I always promised myself I would never hit my children when I grew up and had my own. And so far, I've kept that promise.

                My little cousin also lives with me, and I've had to discipline her a few times (again, never physically): grounding her seems to work the best. So does taking away TV/computer/video game privileges. It's been tough because we actually have more of a brother/sister relationship, but hey... that's life.

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                • #9
                  Re: Discipline...

                  Originally posted by PoiBoy View Post
                  Are you serious Miulang? I don't know many 3-5 year olds that listen nowadays.
                  Teachers nowadays don't have the time or the patience to keep unruly students under control. They'll tell you to have the child evaluated...for their own good. Back when we were small kids, unruly children were just humiliated and chastised, which made them grow up to be bullies.

                  Nowadays, we know that kids with behavior problems sometimes have biological reasons (ADHD, autism, dyslexia) for their behavior that can be treated. There have always been children with those conditions, but in the bad old days, those kids were just labeled "slow" or "different" and carried that stigma for years.

                  Miulang
                  "Americans believe in three freedoms. Freedom of speech; freedom of religion; and the freedom to deny the other two to folks they don`t like.” --Mark Twain

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                  • #10
                    Re: Discipline...

                    When they grow up and question why you hit them ...you can always say "I hit you because I love you"

                    Seriously tho, I don't believe in hitting kids. Hitting kids doesn't teach them right or wrong...it teaches them fear. It doesn't teach them respect either. It's good sometimes for kids to stand up for themselves and talk back.... It comes in handy when they get older and are put in a bad situation. Especially for girls.
                    Last edited by PoiBoy; February 6, 2007, 08:44 PM.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Discipline...

                      Originally posted by Miulang View Post
                      Teachers nowadays don't have the time or the patience to keep unruly students under control. They'll tell you to have the child evaluated...for their own good. Back when we were small kids, unruly children were just humiliated and chastised, which made them grow up to be bullies.

                      Nowadays, we know that kids with behavior problems sometimes have biological reasons (ADHD, autism, dyslexia) for their behavior that can be treated. There have always been children with those conditions, but in the bad old days, those kids were just labeled "slow" or "different" and carried that stigma for years.

                      Miulang
                      Have you seen what the medication does to those kids?
                      There is nothing wrong with a hyper kid. Its not normal for children to sit in a chair all day reading books. People have different personalities...that doesn't mean you should drug them to conform to some idiots ideals of a good student.

                      Have times really changed? I still see "slow" and "different" kids. I still see "bullies".

                      edited
                      Last edited by PoiBoy; February 6, 2007, 09:02 PM.

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                      • #12
                        Re: Discipline...

                        Originally posted by PoiBoy View Post
                        Have you seen what the medication does to those kids?
                        There is nothing wrong with a hyper kid. Its not normal for children to sit in a chair all day reading books. People have different personalities...that doesn't mean you should drug them to conform to some idiots ideals of a good student.
                        I'm not suggesting that you have to drug a child. But I think it's useful to at least know if there's an organic reason for the acting out.

                        Miulang
                        "Americans believe in three freedoms. Freedom of speech; freedom of religion; and the freedom to deny the other two to folks they don`t like.” --Mark Twain

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Discipline...

                          But thats what they do with kids that have those "disorders"

                          Everyone has something wrong with them.
                          This reminds of that movie Gattaca

                          imagine if their was a cure for every disorder. Who would these people be without their "disorders"
                          quote
                          "Abraham Lincoln (Marfan's Syndrome), Emily Dickinson (Manic Depression), Vincent van Gogh (Epilepsy), Albert Einstein (Dyslexia), John F. Kennedy (Addison's Disease), Rita Hayworth (Alzheimer's Disease), Ray Charles (Primary Glaucoma), Stephen Hawking (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis), and Jackie Joyner-Kersee (Asthma)"

                          While I admit some of these "disorders" are extreme....but I think the same logic can be applied. Disorders "help" make people who they are. That hyper kid can do something great....who knows.
                          Last edited by PoiBoy; February 6, 2007, 08:58 PM.

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                          • #14
                            Re: Discipline...

                            Originally posted by PoiBoy View Post
                            There is nothing wrong with a hyper kid. Its not normal for children to sit in a chair all day reading books. People have different personalities...that doesn't mean you should drug them to conform to some idiots ideals of a good student.
                            Many of our charter schools agree. They employ hands-on learning in their curriculum and understand that using the kid's energy in this manner helps him/her harness it. My own kids, when frustrated with a situation in class, have had the benefit of their EAs walk a lap or two around the field with them to talk out and resolve their situations. Two girls fighting over writing stink letters behind each others' backs (oh, to be in 7th grade again) earned them four laps around the field with the counselor until they finished crying, accusing, and getting it all off of their chests. And yes, I got a letter that I had to sign, explaining that the discipline had this integrative approach, including how many laps they had to walk.

                            pax

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                            • #15
                              Re: Discipline...

                              Originally posted by Miulang View Post
                              I'm not suggesting that you have to drug a child. But I think it's useful to at least know if there's an organic reason for the acting out.

                              Miulang
                              The pharmaceutical industry makes up "disorders". Then the quacks make a living off of prescribing that poison.

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